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Counselling sessions for first time mothers

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Having a baby for the first time is an exciting experience. I remember how exciting it was for me over 5 years ago while I was pregnant with the Kiddies. Like most first time mothers to be, it is an experience I can never forget. Having said, the whole pregnancy process is brand new so there is always a bit of anxiety for most new mothers. And for some other mothers to be, the whole period of pregnancy, the thought of child-birth and life after can be pretty scary.

Pregnancy can be so scary for pregnant women, and the fear can even cause problems in your relationship with your spouse/partner, because it may feel hard to describe your feelings. These issues can even cause couples to drift apart, which usually leads to other family issues. Which is why I believe every first time mother should be offered at least one counselling session while pregnant.

 

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First time mothers to be should have counselling sessions

I believe every first time mother to be should be offered some counselling sessions. These counselling sessions should be carried out by a qualified therapist. The sessions can be incorporated with the ante natal classes. I think pregnant women will really benefit from some form of counselling to prepare them for motherhood and the life and body changes that come with it.

There are so many side effects of pregnancy and child-birth no one really talks about. The pregnancy books try to explain them but nothing really prepares you. I read so many pregnancy books, but I remember how shocked I was when I looked at my stomach for the first time after delivery. It didn’t look like mine. It was flappy and looked deflated. So having someone to answer your questions and shed light on issues you may be facing would be a life saver for many mothers to be.

 

Hormones can trigger a mental health issue

Many pregnant women have no idea how the strain of pregnancy will affect their body, mental and physical health. The pregnancy hormones can make women feel more anxious and ‘low’. Some pregnant women develop a mental health problem during pregnancy or within a year of giving birth, which is referred to as the ‘perinatal period’. Here are some examples of perinatal mental health illness –

  • Perinatal obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)
  • Antenatal depression
  • Postnatal depression
  • Anxiety
  • Postpartum psychosis
  • Tokophobia (extreme fear of childbirth)
  • Postpartum post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)

 

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I wish I had the opportunity to speak with to a licensed counsellor about my mental health while pregnant for the first time. Being able to speak with a therapist would have answered many of questions and put my mind at rest. And I know many women feel the exact same way. Having that safe place to pour out your mind and speak about what ever issues or feelings you might be having would make the whole pregnancy process a lot easier for many.

 

What are your thoughts on this? Do you think first time mothers to be should have counselling sessions? Please share in the comment section below. Thanks for stopping by.

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What to do when you want counseling but your spouse doesn’t

Like I said in my previous relationship post, marriage is a lot of work. It takes time and effort to have a happy marriage. Which is why we must always continue to improve our relationship with our spouse. I have been married for almost 10 years and I know how much work is involved. Good marriages struggle for many reasons. Some examples of these struggles are centred around infidelity, finances, in-laws interference, lack of intimacy, an addiction, unhealthy behaviours (manipulating, belittling, name-calling etc.), and so on.

If you marriage is dealing with any of these issues, you and your spouse may need some help from a qualified therapist. But the issue is, these days, many people shy away from counseling for various reasons. Many associate counseling with failure. To them, it means they have failed at their marriage. Others are just too ashamed to open up to a third-party and would rather keep at it or work away.

 

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What to do when you want counseling but your spouse doesn’t

So what do you do when you decide your marriage or relationship needs help but your spouse doesn’t want to speak with anyone? There are 2 options. You could decide to continue being unhappy in your marriage and pretend you are happy and fulfilled. Or you could try following these tips –

 

Give it some time

You could try giving it some time to see if your spouse changes his/her mind. Sometimes, time could help shed some light on the relationship issues and how to go about solving them. The last thing you would want is for your spouse to agree to see a Therapist with you grudgingly. You won’t get any results that way.

 

See a Therapist online

If your spouse is not comfortable with the idea of going to see a Therapist, you could try having online counseling sessions. Your spouse may be more open to these sessions as you can have it from the comfort of your homes and still achieve the same results. Online counseling works great for busy people or when your preferred Therapist is far away.

 

Think outside the box

You can try reading relationship books and blogs with your spouse. There are also various marriage podcasts and movies available you may both find helpful. Sometimes we need to think outside the box when we find ourselves in difficult situations like when you think your marriage needs help and your spouse disagrees.

 

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Work on yourself

When we are dealing with issues, it is always easier to blame someone else for all the problems, and play victim. But the first step in healing and improving is to work on ourselves. So that means reading self-improvement resources and seeing a qualified Therapist if needed to discuss issues. Having a great mental health is essential for a healthy marriage. So take a good look at the mirror and work on yourself.

 

Thanks for reading. Do feel free to leave a comment telling me what you think about relationship issues and going for couple counselling. Also, please remember to share this post on your social media platforms.

 

 

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