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How to Deal with Toxic People and Protect your Mental Health

Toxic people are everywhere so you will come in contact with a few at some point in your life. We have them in schools, offices, families, communities and even in churches. If you are a healthy person, you will find dealing with toxic people draining. I know from experience how draining they can be. Toxic people can drain the life out of you, that undergoing therapy may be the only to regain your sanity.

I have had my own fair share of dealing with toxic people and situations. And I still spot them every now and again. They are everywhere, which makes it almost impossible to completely avoid them. Which is why it is important to know how to deal with toxic people, and protect your mental health.

 

 

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Who are toxic people?

Toxic People are like emotional vampires that drain your energy. They are the people in your life who constantly complain about everything and anything. These people always put the blame on someone else and never take responsibility for their actions or inactions.

Toxic People always turn things around so things you thought they had done wrong are suddenly your fault. They also tend to overreact to bad events and usually have a chaotic life, full of drama and negativity.

 

How do you deal with toxic people?

Dealing with toxic people is quite easy once you know who they are. The first task is identifying the toxic in your life. Once that is done, you will be able to recognise them for what they really are, and ignore their negative energy.

The second task is dealing with the toxic people. The best way of going about this is by minimising contact with them as much as possible. Once you learn to ignore them and not take in their negative energy, you will be fine.

It can be hard to ignore certain situations and people sometimes, but ignoring these people is one of the best things you can do for your mental health. If you get drawn into their negative way of life, the chaos and drama may consumed you, leaving you a shadow of your former self. Rise above them and keep your distance.

 

 

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Protecting your mental health with some therapy

For some of us, it may have taken years to recognise certain people as toxic. This relationship with these people may have left us drained and feeling inadequate. If this is you, then some therapy may be required. Your mental health will thank you for it.

Therapy will help you train yourself when coming in contact with energy draining people. You will learn how to switch off mentally when the complaining, fault-finding and energy-draining behaviour begins.

If the toxic person in your life is a friend or family member you care about, you can encourage them to go into therapy. An experienced Therapist may be able to solve the underlying issue behind the negative way of life.

 

In conclusion

If you have noticed certain people always trigger aggression, frustration, depression, sadness or any other type of negative emotion in you, then looking within may help. Changing the way you react to them may help. You need to understand that you have no control over their behaviour, but you can control yours.

Pay attention to your reaction when these situations present themselves. Ignoring and zoning out does help massively. If your reaction does little or nothing to help, then just reduce the presence of these toxic people in your lives.

I have read loads of books on Psychology as it is an area I have strong interest in for some weird reason. I will be reviewing a couple of the eBooks I have read sometime in the new year, so look at for those review posts if you are interested.

 

How do you deal with toxic people in your life? How do you ensure you take care of your mental health?

 

 

*Collaborative post.

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56 responses

  1. Having an extreme and difficult life story I know far too much on this subject. My mental health was adversely affected. It has taken 16 years of good long term recovery work in various shapes and sizes to get me where I am today.

    A.A 12 step program will always be a part of my life and being with like minded people!.group therapy in the early noughties, family of origin therapy in 2010 and CBT I was led to last year which coincided with the shattering passing of my remarkable 2nd husband unexpectedly this year.

    I found out through my husband passing just how toxic his family is. As someone quiped to me “I think you married the white sheep of that family” My late husband knew but I didn’t realise just how much his family of origin were toxic up to his passing.

    His one brother who David would flatten and disown, his sister who is an emotional cripple and niece who is a drama queen would also get told a few home truths.

    They did all this too, when there dad died too 16 years ago. Caused absolute chaos. Thank goodness they live a few hundred miles away. Fortunately not all his family are like it and I do still have contact with some.

    The BiL threatened our eldest, our other adult youngsters, me, our DiL and grandchildren with violence. I kid you not. All because he didn’t think they had been told the truth about my husband unexpected passing.

    Erm where were you in all this and the 16 years previous? He didn’t come up for our wedding even. He never contacted my husband and it was me who encouraged the relationship with my husband and him. There wouldn’t have been one if it wasn’t for me.

    My eldest dealth with him. Ok all words. The 2 that caused the trouble didn’t home up for the service. Whst a surprise.

    I will not have toxic people anywhere near me. They have to go. It caused additional pain to work through too.

    However has I heard recently “how you do one thing is how you do everything” so I should have been prepared for it. I wasn’t. Thank God I never have to see or hear from those 2 again

    • I am so sorry to hear about this Carol. They sound horrible. Good your eldest took care of him. Toxic people should be kept very far away. Good you don’t have to see or hear from them again.

  2. Cutting off contact is the best advice. I recently cut someone out of my life who used to be a close friend. It got to the brenn point of him acting as an aggressor constantly and picking fights among friends while accepting little to no fault. I am battling grief and trauma. I don’t need vampiric energy anywhere near me. I feel so much better now.

  3. I used to work a corporate 9-5 job and after doing it for a decade, I called it quits. OMG, some people have spreading negativity as a hobby! I think the best way to deal with them is to turn a deaf ear, or just simply avoid them and just concentrate on yourself and your job.

  4. Oh boy – I learned awhile ago to rid my life of toxic people! It took me a long time to realize I didn’t need these types of people in my life but I found myself putting fat too much energy into these friendships and getting nothing in return. I’ve made my peace with it and enjoy the important things now more than ever!

  5. This advice on how to deal with toxic people is spot on. Sometimes we can’t always avoid toxic people, but our attitude can be better than the negativity they spew out. I have learned not to let a toxic person change my attitude or else I end up becoming toxic myself and I definitely don’t want that.

  6. I want to learn how to shut off the negativity mentally. Toxic people should just build their own city and stay there. I hate it when all you hear is negative remarks, complaints, and baseless opinions. It really zaps my energy away. If I could find a way to mentally convert those negative people into grains of sand, that would be nice.

  7. I have been around toxic people and I can attest to it that they are draining… I wish some kind of magic could snap toxic people out of their miserable funk and join the non-complaining happy people.
    Great read and right on target ; )

  8. It’s never too late for your problems to be solved, it’s time to have a change in life for the better and don’t just sit back and think your worst situation cannot be changed for better.

  9. I think I’m starting to get better, to recognise toxic people and to make better decisions. This has taken years, literally. Sometimes frankly it’s easier to be on one’s own! Lovely post … thank you. Katie x

  10. I agree with you there and also with God’s help anything can be achieved.
    For me Mental Health is all about ‘the way of expression’ if you can express properly then Son, you’re on the right track. Being expressive does not always mean to be an extrovert but what I mean by ‘expressive’ is speaking what you feel.

    So, in 2019 if you want to stabilise and then improve your Mental Health then you need to keep a proper check on your emotions. Now, I’ll be mentioning 6 emotions to take care of in 2019 to improve your Mental Health and also how to improve your mental health.

    Hypocrisy
    Jealousy
    Power of Acceptance
    Compassion
    Understanding EGO!
    Sense of Belonging.

    Take a read as its important for all of us to understand these emotions to improve our Mental Health and also feel free to share it.
    Follow this:
    Have a great day!

  11. Pingback: Spending time on self-care this year - fashionandstylepolice

  12. Hello Im new to this I need some help ima really energetic person but I have negative people always bagging on me and bringing me down please help I tried being cool and now I gotta be mean to mean to them to get my point across because they dont pay attention or care and when they want my advise they’re all up and saying me and then when I ask they say that they dont care

    • Best to stay away from the negative energy around. I would just ignore the ones bringing me down and focus on the people that care.

  13. Almost everybody I have to deal on a day to day basis is toxic. At first I thought I could help them but I’ve recently realized that depressed people stay depressed until they get tired of it. I am slowly pushing these people out of my life and out of my way.

  14. Yes 🙌🏻 I am having to take a step back and make sure boundaries are in place when I deal with a toxic friend now. I thought something was wrong with me, I went to counselling and realised I was seeking reassurance I was a good person from the wrong people. Thank you, great article 👍🏻

  15. Great post! When I was younger I used to attract toxic people. I was gullible, way too nice and never spoke up for myself. As I’ve gotten older, matured and found my self-worth I no longer allow people to walk over me. I developed a stronger personality and I check negatively at the door. Because of this, toxic people don’t want to spend that much time with me anymore. I make sure to continue to be loving and cordial as this is Christlike but I’m careful about the way I communicate and how much time I spend with them. “The one walking with the wise will become wise,But the one who has dealings with the stupid will fare badly.” (Proverbs 13:20)

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